Mood Swings

Source: sororitystace.tumblr.com via Leslie on Pinterest

Don't you love that quote?!? It's really true, and really fitting after my day. Today has just not been my day! To get to that though, I should update you on the background story.

Justin and I got the results of our fertility testing, and (like we assumed) I am the problem. My PCOS keeps me from having the right amount of progesterone to ovulate, and without that there's no chance of getting preggers. While that sounds all down in the dumps, it's actually what we were praying for. We feel very blessed that this was our answer. I've had to wait about 3 weeks to being a new cycle to start taking my lovely Clomid prescription that we are confidently praying will end positively (pun intended) for us. Clomid is not a friendly drug though. I loved (and appreciated) that my doctor looked at Justin when she was telling me about taking Clomid and specifically told him, "She's gonna have mood swings. You're gonna think she's going crazy." Boy, was she right!

I was taking it at night to hopefully avoid having the side effects like nausea and headaches by sleeping through it. I learned the very first day that it wasn't going to happen like that. I immediately started having them. My worse side effect of them all has been the hot flashes. Oh.My.Word. I have never, ever in my life experienced anything like that. I would be perfectly fine, and the next minute I would feel like I was on FIRE from the inside out. When it's 9,000 degrees already in the hottest summer in Texas since 1925, hot flashes are so not a good thing. Whew! I've had bouts of nausea, some pretty gnarly headaches, and TMI WARNING: feeling my ovaries being swollen. Luckily, the mood swings come and go, and I think I've controlled them fairly well. I haven't let loose on anyone, but I have had to bite my tongue just about in half to keep it in. (I'm really thankful I haven't had any weepy swings. Those are so embarrassing!) Justin said that if I was going to act like a psycho, he'd at least find comfort in the fact that I knew I was being irrational. I've tried to make it clear that I know I'm being stupid, but I just can't help it. No matter what though, as crazy as it sounds, I am thrilled to be experiencing these crazy side effects. It means that the Clomid is doing something, and that is what we want. If there were no effects, I think I would be very disappointed. I don't want to be a complainer about any of this because I know that there are people who are in much harder places than I am. This road will lead us to where we want to be, and I'm choosing to be appreciative of it all.

Today. Today has been a mood swing day. Little stupid things (like someone stealing my idea) have just completely gotten under my skin. I had to laugh when I saw the quote above pinned on my Pinterest. I realized that Sirius was oh, so right about that one! However, I'm going to chose to let the good out. After all, I don't want to walk around acting like Bellatrix.